On January 26, 2011 my beautiful 16-year-old niece Amber Lynn Hiker died. How Amber died is still a small bit of a mystery. The doctors do say it was her own hand-a suicide. Her mom believes that there was too much evidence to overlook the possibly that someone else was there and may have been involved. I have asked the Lord so many questions surrounding her passing and He has answered every question quickly and thoroughly. Except, for some of the details about how and why she died. Although I was not there in the area, even though I was over 3000 miles away His answers for every other question were all completely accurate and true---but He will not answer any of the questions on the how and why.

         Why? I think it is because it does not matter. A tragic teen death is a tragic teen death and the real question is: where are they? I can’t answer that question for every teen murder, suicide or unnatural passing and they all are: Tragic Teen Deaths. But, I can answer that question for this one, this unexpected loss. Where is she?

         Amber is in Heaven.

         The God given evidence presented to my family of ‘where she is now’ has been overwhelming. We want to share this with others to help anyone affected by tragic teen death to encourage them to ask the same questions of the Lord we did and to allow them to see the same evidence in God’s Word of His grace and mercy, even in tragic teen death. The goal is to have some hope of heaven after a stressful event that has been compared to that of a “concentration camp experience”.

         Let’s begin. Clearly, Amber was not ready to pass. She had not done it all yet. She aspired to become a military officer. This runs in our family. My dad was in the Air force, my self I was an officer in the Air force and then there was our ancestor Robert E. Lee a General in the confederacy. She was not serving Christ yet, but she was serving her fellow man. At some point she had professed a belief in Jesus as the Son of God who died for her, but really she was a deeply and completely loved rebellious teenager doing her thing-full on!

         Let’s review. For a young girl she had a lot to do and plenty of friends. An award winning Girl Scout who received the Bucks Harris Award for 2011, an honor student in many advanced classes who was adored by most every teacher for her intelligence and human compassion; she was as bright and energetic as she was extremely beautiful and funny! Always trying to lighten someone up-and she was good at a practical joke. It was only one of the reasons, everyone, yes everyone loved Amber. She was a very bright spot in our family history. One of our very best and my family has produced a lot of good-looking winners.

         She was however, not living at home with her mom whom she refused to obey-in open rebellion having over the past two years tired a few different homes landing in her dads home struggling with her use of booze, drugs, and all night parties with a cretin she called a ‘boyfriend’. The boyfriend was 25 years old. That was illegal for the two to be intimate. She was 14 when they met. He was a known felon with a job selling drugs. If we are going to tell the truth, that is it if it infuriates him or not.

         She wasn’t living for Jesus. We don’t even know if she was ‘born again’. However, we do know she is ‘holy’ in heavenly places living in glory, not ashamed of how she got there-she fit right in. She is basking in God’s Glory and she spends a lot of time making sure we are well. Heaven sends signs all the time. We think that in heaven are angels that can be placed in service for our benefit, anytime we bother to ask. We think that Amber at times puts them in service for us to help us. Heaven. That place is full of holy rollers and now she is one-and loving it!

         How is that possible?

         1 Corinthians chapter 7.  When a believer, my sister Amber’s mom is a Christian, who refuses to give up on an unbeliever and will not depart-a non-believing spouse is sanctified by her belief and her children who were considered unclean; but now are holy. That’s right, holy. Read the entire book and you will see yourself. It is in the word. My sister did not give up on either Amber or her dad. The word is clear that if the non-believer chooses to depart, the believer is under no bondage.

         You as a parent are not a believer? Become one. However, what does the word say about children in general? See Matthew 18. This is paraphrased. The disciples asked Jesus “who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” Then Jesus called a child to him, set him in the midst of them and said “suredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. For to such belong the kingdom of heaven and such are the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Whoever receives one little child in My name receives Me.” Get on board parents. Your innocent children who passed are there in heaven. Jesus goes on to say “whoever causes one of these children to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe to the world because of offenses. For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offenses come”. Grieving parents, the Lord will avenge you your loss. Take heart. God lost His own Son painfully for both of them. He does understand-He still says “I will avenge”.

         As much as has been taken from us, we as a family can agree, unnaturally, we have been given in return supernatural experiences we can hold on to and the Lord Himself is giving us back His justice and we are not relying on the justice of the world.

         There is the issue of the age of innocence to keep in mind. The Biblical concept of the "age of accountability" is that children are not held accountable by God for their sins until they reach a certain age, and that if a child dies before reaching the "age of accountability,' that child will, by the grace and mercy of God, be granted entrance into Heaven. Although she was 16 and some scholars say the age of accountability is 12, only God knows for sure when someone is of the age. She did make it, and possibly she as not of age as God saw it.

         As far as suicide being self-murder and an unforgivable sin, well that simply is not Matthew 12:31 that correctly states that “blasphemy of the Holy Spirit” is the only unforgivable sin.

         Many of our close and extended family went to our close spiritual leaders for help and guidance in this situation. All over the United States, from Virginia to Florida to California, every minister, priest or pastor involved said the same thing “they feel this was one mistake and she is forgiven and she is in Heaven”.

         In her life Amber was a victim. We are healing and recovering but we are a dysfunctional family. We have a history of addictions and co-dependencies. No one asks to be born that way. Trust me! When you are, you just do your best to deal with it. Many of us are in programs now or have learned to live again but Amber did not have a chance to try recovery yet. But, God uses broken people. This issue is an illness like cancer. There is no judgment in having cancer-so please don’t judge anyone who has any part of addictive disease---please pray for them instead like you would a friend who has a brain tumor. However, no one is allowed to break the law or have immoral character. That, the Lord will deal with. Neither should anyone allow that behavior from anyone else. The Bible declares that we should depart from evil and do good Psalm 34:14. In her life Amber was surrounded by, lets call it what it is: s.h.i.t. and she was pursued by a predator.

         For many in my family we have had to put up a wall of forgiveness over certain things, or we’d go mad. This did take effort and time. The Lord having forgiven us much-how could we not do the same.

         The following is our evidence for Amber’s eternity in Paradise. One is me. On day three of her passing I had a dream that was so clear and I will never forget it. Amber came to me with long dark hair and wrapped in purple as a happy teen singing “The Lord’s Prayer”. Her favorite color was purple. I was not able to travel to the service. I did not know any of these facts until well after day seven. I had not seen Amber for two years. I did not know how she would be laid to rest. She was laid to rest in long dark hair, wearing purple and by the way she did sing exactly as she did for me-her mom confirmed. You see the coincidence is that Amber was born with light curly hair and I had never heard her sing before that dream. 

         Next, my nephew Michael in Hawaii at the time Amber ‘whth’ (from here on this stands for went home to heaven) had a dream. He saw a lady with straight dark hair dressed in purple walking on the water towards him as he was in the ocean straddling his surfboard. He is a professional surfer. In the vivid dream she met him there in his element walking on the water. Who does that? Jesus did. The word says when we see Him, we will be like Him. For we will see Him as He is. She clearly did that. The next morning Michael called his mom, telling her about the dream and she told him about Amber’s passing. She also sent him her recent picture, computers rock, and he said that that was the woman he had seen walking on the water. He had not seen Amber for over two years.

         My other nephew Carter a solider in prep for the Navy Seals no less-was so angry after Amber passed he had to be talked down, a lot, to avoid inflicting punishment on the boyfriend whom he had predicted that if Amber pursued this relationship she would end up dead. He, wanting to avenge her, had an experience that set him free. In a room alone while he was deciding what to do he felt his shoulder and back being caressed and rubbed and a soft voice spoke in his ear “he had nothing to do with this” which gave him chills as he recognized the voice as Amber’s. Carter, describing that as his first supernatural experience was instantly delivered from the need to retaliate. My nephew is “Called of God” in my humble opinion. I do not think that will be his last encounter with the supernatural side of our God.
         My dad and I are both known lunatics for the Lord and we had quietly decided to pray Amber back to her body on day three. We believe in resurrection-it does happen. But not everyone wants to return. Heaven is a better home hand’s down to anything we have on the earth. And I know that some souls are not at rest yet, after taking their lives. Not Amber. It was too soon when she saw Jesus, but we believe she convinced Him to allow her to stay. When Amber stood before Jesus they both knew she was not ready. So, she told Him her best joke...He laughed and He made her whole, Then He made heaven her home. 

         Her mother who had the courage to face that room where the heinous death act happened and while she was speaking with Amber’s step-mom, not a nice woman (I want to be generously kind) my sister Tracy had an experience where she, Amber’s mom, felt her, Amber’s body pass through her. Tracy is Amber’s real mom. That was day three. Tracy knew it was Amber and it was a wonderful spiritual experience. It was that night I had a dream that a beautiful girl with straight dark hair was singing The Lord’s Prayer. As a worship leader for 10 years, Amber knows that I know what people do in Heaven. They Praise God. She is. My sister a believer who had ‘lost’ her child for a while to the darker side of this world was once again completely united with her daughter in that supernatural experience. Amber by choice returned to her mom, and her mom’s belief in Christ providing a chance to be holy in Christ’s presence not a soul wandering for placement according to 1 Corinthians 7. Amber was a flawed human being. She used a lot of her energy trying to make sense of her relationship with her dad. She did not get what she was looking for from him, at all. She got what she was looking for from God. She came to me in a dream to let me know her heavenly Father had made her whole. He Himself was the Father she deserved and needed. No part of her would ever be broken, again.

         My dad, my sister Amber’s mom and I have all three had an experience more than once that we describe as “Amber’s sound”. We hear, not seeing anything, but hear a heavenly instrumental sound that can’t be described in earthly musical terms. I’m a musician and can’t describe it but we all agree it is a combination of wind chimes, wind instrument and glass beads beautifully striking. The sound is distinctly heavenly, beautiful and reassuring. Amber has a sound and we three have joined the club. It happen only twice for me, but I knew I had just heard from heaven. Chimes, wind instrument and glass beads.

         Amber’s mom summoned the courage to ask the Lord for her own sign of confirmation, afraid of the answer- but, she asked God to show her a rainbow on a sunny day. It was 5:00 pm when she saw it, on the last stop of her day on her way home. But, there it was in living color-a rainbow. Several days later, she saw three yellow butterflies. Amber’s close family was she, her mom, and her sister. The three of them lived and did their best to love one another. The ‘butterfly’ sign is a sign of delicate beauty and the yellow color-actually the name is ‘amber’ and in the Bible amber refers to God’s Glory see Ezekiel 1:4 and the brightness of Christ see Revelation 21:23. Yellow, or amber is also used to describe gold. Psalm 68:13 states that the streets of heaven are gold.


         My dad a prophet has had several experiences regarding Amber, including hearing Amber’s sound once at night and once in broad daylight. He had many, many dreams and he has had about 6 or 7 times now found dollar bills-never having found one in his life-which come at opportune times to remind him Amber is in heaven and angels are real. 

         I was given a sign during a grieving period where I was running a tub of water and the water turned purple. I thought it was from grief and I could be passing out when I remembered purple was Amber’s favorite color. It happens all the time-I will walk into a room full of people and one person will be wearing really bold purple. When asked if they do that all the time they answer no, the don’t wear purple often at all. After discussing purple as Amber’s “I’m OK“sign to me, that person I am talking to always turns out to have a horror story of a past suicide in their life and when I tell them about Amber’s Angels they are comforted. The world is not merciful in these situations. God is Mercy. Every time they are certain their loved one made it to heaven they just needed confirmation or healing.

         The Lord always speaks to me through music. I have several accounts of how He uses our music titles to tell me something. I have it saved that on the day Amber passed our song “In the Splendor of His Glory” hit the top ten chart at number 7. Seven is the number of completion. The next day it dropped to number 6. Six is the number of man. I got a little confused, and then realized that the following day on day three the charts showed two songs on the top ten. One is “Blessed Believer” in the number 6 spot and one song “In the Splendor of His Glory” was number 10. Six and 10 equal 16. Amber was 16!

         Amber was given amazing grace in her entrance to heaven. She was someone that everyone could love, even those simply envious of her. She is singing God’s praises. God is her father now. She was laid to rest appearing angelic. Several of God’s anointed servants had chills looking over her body as the Lord told them “She is with Me”. Her ministry is called Amber’s Angels. 

         My husband and I did some of the music for the service. Over 1000 people attended who came to say their goodbyes and offer support.  Some openly said they were sorry, who had wronged her in her life. She was so beautiful many could not get past a jealousy of her. We did not put everything together until much later but we now know that God had a plan and the music selection proved it. All who attended said of Amber’s service it was beautiful! Truly, beautiful! 

          So what now? A ministry. A ministry you ask? Sure. What is a ministry for someone who passed away? A ministry is anyone or anything that brings someone to Christ. Wins a soul for eternal life. On the day of the funeral of a child so many said her service was moving and beautiful bringing them closer to Christ. Someone that day approached the pastor and asked to receive Jesus. And “it” was born. Her ministry. "Amber’s Angels". It is alive and well and although she cannot do anything else to earn eternal rewards for herself through the ministry, we can. We do. She will reap the benefits. We are eternally grateful she lived. She will be eternally grateful we continued her ministry for the Kingdoms sake. Rewards are not given when a person arrives in heaven. They are given on the last day. Judgment day. The reason is because rewards continue long after we leave this earth. Grief is a process and it is, at times very hard. We choose to live well and allow Amber Angel’s to live though us.

         For my sister Tracy...the Lord told me that there will come a day when people will “wish they were you”. Kings and Queens have tried and failed to have a child this full of beauty and intelligence and selflessness. The Lord told me Amber is being raised by royalty in heaven, namely Lady Diana and Anne Boleyn. I never thought about it but the young who pass still need to be raised to maturity.

         Lady Diana died on Tracy’s birthday August 31 and was 31 years old, Tracy’s exact age at the time. Ann Boleyn’s daughter Queen Elizabeth was the namesake for Amber’s birth state Virginia. Virginia was named in the 17th century for “The Virgin Queen”. 

         In heaven I have been told that the flowers sing and the animals talk. Amber is in heaven with my first and only child at the time my dog Brittany. Brittany was named after Amber’s sister Brittany. If Amber felt alone or scared in her last days, my Brittany will tell her how much she was loved by all of her family here on the west coast.

         Logan Meredith is one of Amber’s Angels. She was a friend of Amber’s who posted information about Amber on a face book page for Amber called “Rest in Paradise Amber Hilker” face book page. That proved to be so valuable to a family in shock and grief to see her recent pictures and hear from her friends who organized a day called “Honor Amber Day” in which 645 kids wore purple on a Friday for Amber. In the description of the site they wrote this: This group is dedicated to a very special girl  Rest in Paradise Amber Hilker  You will be missed and are very much-loved 

         Children honor your parents. The Lord has commanded it. It is the fourth commandment and holds a warning: “so that your days may be long and things go well with you”. Dishonor won’t allow that protective blessing. 

         In thinking this way only a tragedy, my husband and I had just published a book called “The Victory Prayer”. I said to the Lord, how could we put out a book about victory when this isn’t. Remember purple was my sign from Amber she was ok; well we didn’t remember until it came-the book was purple! We did not recall choosing that color. Logan Meredith who had done the face book page also had made purple Amber bracelets for us to wear in memory of her. The bracelet’s and the books came in our mail on the same day.

         If something like this happens to your family I want to remind you of this scripture found in Matthew 10:32-39. The Lord Jesus is speaking: “Therefore, whoever confesses Me before men, him I will also confess before My father who is in heaven. But whoever denies Me before men, him I will also deny before my Father who is in heaven. Do not think I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to bring peace but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law and a man’s enemies will be those of his own household. He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me and he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who does not take his cross and follow after Me is not worthy of Me. He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for My sake will find it”. Jesus said this. In Matthew 10 the Lord reminds us that His plans are eternal and in the short term we must not love our lives unto the death.

         A short poem I want to share with those who are grieving: 


Won’t you come and hide

Change my pride

To live Your ways

For all my days

Repay us, O Lord

According the work of our ways

And in Your will

Keep us still

Hold us up with your strong hand

Love us more as you hold us near Your heart

In Your mind prioritize us

As we honor You properly

Be Ye our reward

         Those that go on to heaven before us are allowed to look on to see what we are doing. Hebrews 12:1 says, “Wherefore, seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us. Going on to verse 2: “Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame and He is set down at the right hand of the throne of God”.

         Have you suffered a loss? Living well is the best revenge. Have you been wronged? Jesus was too. What’s better justice than going to heaven? There is no sense of time in heaven. There are no more tears in heaven. There is no association to the pain on the earth in heaven.

         What joke Amber told Jesus was probably, her mom said ‘she told the Jonah in the belly of the whale joke'. That Sunday I had also heard that joke told by the Joel Osteen ministry on TV! 

         My sister Tracy is still struggling to recover and just wants to hold Amber.  She did not know that the Lord had this ministry in store for her. Desiring a full recovery, her next step is to figure this out and to find God’s next blessing for her. She also has challenged Him to show her what ‘double for my trouble’ found in the book of Job means.  We as a family try, but we fail. It seems there is really not much to do but let Tracy and Brittany grieve their loss. Let them alone and have time to feel bad. It is an honor to grieve someone you love who ‘whth’. We hope that Tracy, a mom will turn her time and attention on Brittany her other remarkable and amazing daughter who has a brand new son.

         My oldest sister Charlene was with Amber’s mom the first night of this terrible tragedy. She said Tracy’s cell phone was ringing all night long. You see the folks that arrange for organ transplant called “Life Net” had only 12 hours to get Tracy’s permission to use an organ of Amber’s. My sister Charlene was hoping it was Amber calling!

         We will miss her so much. Amber is not lost, she is found. She is not dead, she is alive in Heaven. We will see her again. Now, all we have to do is get there.

Amber’s Angels.